Standards...

Has there ever been a time when you don't feel like you meet standards? Now these could be standards you have put before you or these could be standards of a friend.

Well I am in that place, actually I think I have been in that place for awhile now. I feel my house is never as clean as I would like it and there are always never ending piles of laundry and dishes. There always seems to be something that needs to be organized or taken care of. I just feel like my life is constantly playing "catch-up". Just when I feel like one task is completed, there is always something else around the corner. I can never feel like I can get ahead. But it doesn't stop at material things it also goes right into relationships and parenting. After being married for 9 years I still struggle with a couple of issues that came up when we first got married. As much as I work on them, they are still areas that don't come easy for me and I seem to kick myself every time one of those areas come up. I know there are things that I need to work on to be a better parent. I feel like I don't spend enough quality time with my kids, somedays they watch to much tv, I loose my patience with my kids and end up yelling at my kids too much and the list goes on and on.

Just even writing this I feel somewhat like a failure. I have expectations and standards that I have given myself or I have felt from others that I don't meet. I feel like I sometimes get so stuck, because all I can see are the things I'm not doing right that doing anything overwhelms me. It is easier for me to sit and dwell on all my mistakes, failures, not met standards/expectations, or things that need to be done then to work on something that I could succeed

Today, during my quiet time with the Lord, I started writing how I was feeling and how I just felt like I could never meet the standards I had in my life. The Lord showed me, during this time that I was too focused on my weakness and my failures to see my strengths and accomplishments. Then He reminded me of something my Pastor said a couple weeks ago "we need to focus on our strengths and develop those gifts that God has given us, instead of trying to improve our weakness. The Potter has made me a certain way, I can't change that, so I need to accept who He has made me to be." The Lord reminded me to focus on my strengths and the gifts He has given me. Where I am weak, He is strong and He will help me in my weaknesses. Instead of getting so upset over all that I do wrong, the Lord wants me to focus on the things I do right. I am not and will not be good at everything, but there are somethings I do well. Those are the things I need to work on and not get so hung up every time I fail at something.

I realized that the standards/expectations that I felt in my life were not from God. They were put there by myself or others (even without them realizing it). God spoke to me and said "You have allowed standards/expectations to be put in your life that are not mine. I give you grace for when you fail or stumble AND you need to give yourself grace for you fail or stumble. Allow yourself to breath and make mistakes, to not be the perfect wife, mother, friend and daughter. You are the one beating yourself up, not me!"


2 Corinthians 12:9 "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness...For when I am weak, then I am strong." 


Zechariah 4:6 "Not by might, nor by power, but by my Spirit says the Lord."


I am human, I make mistakes, I have weaknesses and some of them can be really ugly, but I also have some beautiful strengths that the Lord has blessed me with. I need to remember to focus on my strengths and NOT my weaknesses. I need to remember that God gives me grace and I need to give myself grace. I will never be the perfect wife, mother, cook or housekeeper but I don't have to be! The only standards that NEED to matter in my life are God's standards for my life. I think the most beautiful thing the Lord showed me today was His standards keep rising for me. The more I grow in Him and the more I realize who He is, the standards He has for me rise, but they never rise out of reach.